Dear Men, We are Sorry.

A revolution has taken over and has had all men up in arms. Females across the world have joined forces, deciding that enough is enough. Saying goodbye to traditional gender roles, women have taken a stance as a force to reckon with.

No, this is not another “pro-women, I want to be just as equal as you, give me sex when I want and let me dominate” rant. This serves as an apology to all men who have had a scuffle with this developing ideology.

Feminists believe in an advocacy of women’s rights based on the equality of the sexes. Which means that a relationship today, not only has to try to overcome the normal relationship challenges, but men now have to try dealing with two alphas in the relationship.

Roles have altered and women have increasingly become driven by the need for success, matching that of their male counterparts. Undeniably, women have triumphantly broken boundaries; made remarkable breakthroughs in previously male dominated careers (e.g. construction), proudly taken up positions of service in war, are driving sports cars, and successfully managing households as single parents.

In the work environment, women have made leaps of success, with gender barriers being as close to non-existent than they have ever been.

Now do not get me wrong, women’s rights should always be given top priority and empowering us with equal opportunities will never be out of anyone’s reach or too much to ask for.

However, in the same breath, women say that they wish to work equally long side men, but will admit to wanting a man who will lead and dominate in a relationship.

So dear Men, we are sorry.

It would seem the general standpoint is that: “I am man enough to do the heavy lifting, do not mistake me for a helpless woman”. However, on a date, mind your manners, be a man; pay for dinner.

Dear Men, we are sorry.

“I am taking up the position of authority, and my word is final”. However, in the household, it is the man’s duty to pay the bills.

Dear Men, we are sorry.

“I do not need a relationship and can as most men, enjoy nothing but casual flings”. However, in the case of danger, the man has to be the shield and protect me.

We are so sorry.

In our attempts to become your dominating equals, we neglected the effect it would have on relationships. While as men, you have fallen victim to these double standards and indecisiveness.

By blurring lines and shifting roles, men subsequently stepped back and granted us our wishes. This in turn has caused an uproar with the likes of trending topics; “#men are trash”, on Twitter, being heavily debated. Although humorous, it raises many concerns as to where feminists draw the line.

By these standards, are women willing to change flat tyres, be long distant truck drivers or become gardeners and painters?  Moreover, if we are really talking equality, why not take it a step further and allow women to pay lobola to the families’ of their soon-to-be-husband.

When will men be allowed to open doors for us, or are we confident liberals who will not be shackled by traditional norms?

We have become so preoccupied with our quest for equality; however, it comes only on our own terms. Injecting ourselves with pride-modified testosterone, at the price of damaging any chance of a healthy relationship.

As the famous African proverb states; “Men are the head while women are the neck”. Women need to realise a head cannot function without a neck. What good will a body with two heads and no neck be? In our tug-of-war for equal roles in relationships, we have failed to realise that it is inherent to our beings to be submissive. Equality in relationships cannot exist, despite the modern woman convincing herself otherwise.

Sir William Gerald Golding said; “I think women are foolish to pretend they are equal to men, they are far superior and always have been”. Once women embrace this then they will understand that being a powerful woman does not mean being confined to changing nappies and slaving over a hot stove.

Not only is this an apology, but it is also serves as reminder to all men that submission is not dead.  Women still want to be led by a man, who will do the providing and make them feel safe and protected at all times.

So dear men, please do not grow tired of being the head of the household, despite fighting an uphill battle. And while you may lead, always remember to be understanding of your queen and support her ambitions.

Understandably, it would be easier to sit back and allow the battle to overcome you. However, in a world full of boys, please continue to be men. We need you.


A traditional woman.

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